The United States Federal Governemnt budgets $105 million, yearly, for abstinence education¹. It is speculated that the total spending across all federal government programs having to do with abstinence education is nearly one billion dollars². Safe sex and family planning budgets have dwindled at the federal level for the past few years (particularly during the Bush administration), from an all-time high of $1.73 billion (in 2002)³ a number closer to that of abstinence education during that same time period. In a sense, abstinence education and safe-sex/family planning is changing places in the face of the government.

Abstinence education teaches children and teens that the only method of safe sexual encounters is abstinence. Additionally, the program stresses waiting until marriage for psychological reasons, as well. The program - depending on the program administrator/speaker - also usually mentions that sex before marriage often leads to physical and psychological issues⁴.

Safe-sex and family planning programs teach children and teens that, while the social norms and mores state that individuals should abstain from sex until marriage, it is generally understood that many young people will not. The program goes on to stress that the decision to enter into a sexual relationship, prior to marriage, should not be taken lightly; however, should a couple enter into a sexual relationship, they should utilize the appropriate protections from both disease and unwanted pregnancy. The safe-sex/family planning programs take a hard line against sexual activity prior to marriage - and especially prior to the age of majority. Although these hard lines are stressed, the program facilitators also explain the methods of protection availible should an individual choose to engage in sexual activity. In short, children and teens are taught how to protect themselves from sexually transmitted diseases, and unwanted pregnancies. Planning, preparedness, and safety are stressed, and stressed hard, in the safety/planning programs⁵.

It has been shown in several studies that abstinence education simply does not work. Although the number of young people and teens pledging abstinence until marriage (through either verbal contracts, or “promise” pledges at schools and/or churches) is on the rise, studies are showing that around 86% of individuals still have sexual intercourse before marriage, with a staggering 73% of teens having intercourse before the age of majority⁶.

Now is the time that we segway from the facts and figures, and enter into the domain of personal ideology and personal opinion. During middle and high school, I sat through no fewer than five safe-sex/family planning series (whether in health class, or in special all-grade lectures), and no fewer than three abstinence education series (in both high school and church groups). In the abstinence education series, only one speaker brought up safe sex practices. Those were brought up as a family planning possibility, should a married couple not want children. In all cases, abstinence - and only abstinence was stressed for teens. During these series, teens were given absolutely no options outside of simply not. having. sex.

Tell me. When you were a teen, and someone berated you over, and over, and over again about not doing something, how long did you wait before you finally did it? Exactly. While I doubt this leads to most pre-marriage sexual interludes, I would say it does cause the rebellion idea to pop into teens’ minds, occasionally.

It works like this, folks. I’m twenty-eight years old. I have only recently (about a year ago) met the woman I intend to marry. Obviously, since we are intending to marry (to the point of discussing dates, details, etc…), it should be okay for us to have (safe)_sex, even before the actual ceremony (even according to most abstinence educators). Do you think she was the first woman I ever slept with? Don’t fool yourself by thinking “yes.” Although I have not been with many women, my fiance was definately not the first. Did the abstinence education work? Obviously not.

The safe-sex education did, though. I have never had unprotected sex - whether that protection be for disease issue, or pregnancy issue, I have always made certain to discuss safety with my partner before engaging in sexual activity.

Look, what I’m getting at is this. The government is slowly taking money away from the programs that work (safe-sex/family planning), and putting it toward programs that are proven not to work. Let’s get our heads on straight, here, people. This is not the 1940’s. Hell, this isn’t even the 1960’s. Teens - at least the majority of them - are going to have sex before marriage, regardless of what you say. Is it right? Who cares. We should forget about passing judgement, and start passing along safety tips.

Go out there, and help spread the word about safer sex. Don’t forget to explain that it really is best to wait until marriage, but if a teen chooses not to, they have options to protect themselves.

Oh, and while we’re at it, send an e-mail, fax, or phone call to your senator and congressperson and ask them to support safe sex education, and to lower their support for abstinence-only education.

¹The Spending Bill: What’s Inside? - Dec 07, 2004. ²“Teen Sex,” The Discovery Channel, 2005. ³Medical Accuracy Debate: Act Now to Protect Children, Linda Klepacki, Mar 09, 2005. ^{4 - 5}Personal experience throughout author’s educational years. ⁶“Teen Sex,” The Discovery Channel, 2005.

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